Another Blessing: I'm Not The Best Mama, But I Try

Benz Baby #2, you should just realize this early in life. I am NOT the best mom around. But you should also know that I will always try to be the best for you. I love you so much already. Your blog has been thin and for that I apologize. I thought I'd write a post to tell you a little about this pregnancy.

I've watched you grow big and healthy and strong. You, unlike your sister, were quick to turn vertex (head down) and settle into my pelvis. I am incredibly thankful for this. In fact, you are so settled into my pelvis that I have dreams about you coming out very quickly. This is my biggest birth fear, I think. We talked about it in our childbirth class (pictures below.) I am very used to a long labor and while I don't want a super long labor this time, I would like some time to get used to the idea of being in labor. So, if you wouldn't mind, don't speed your way out, OK? I am having fun imagining your birth. We are giving birth at Clark Memorial Hospital with one of the midwives (whoever happens to be on call - Beth or Alison), Robin and Stacie will be our doulas and we're open to the idea of your sister being there. She loves coming to the prenatal appointments, holding the doppler, well...pretty much anything that has to do with you. We've graduated out of our childbirth class. It definitely made me feel more prepared and excited for your birth! I've been reading positive birth stories at night. There is so much wonder about when and how you will make your appearance.

Also, because your little head is worked so well into my pelvis, I've been having some trouble with pelvis and hip pain, also known as SPD (Syphasis Pubic Dysfunction.) I've been seeing a chiropractor and getting massages to help but I'm at the point where turning over at night is almost impossible. It's gotten easier since I learned the "put your knees together and squeeze your hips as you turn" method, but phew! Monday I start physical therapy and I hope to be in tip-top shape for your birth.

Speaking of, I've kind of been slacking in the exercise department. Mostly I've been good at the sitting on the couch department. So, one of my New Year's Goals is to exercise 15 minutes a day.

We spend our days taking care of your sister, resting and working. I'm finishing my internship at Suburban hospital and lots of patients still ask if I'm pregnant (Uh, yes, 9 months, in fact.) I sit down at night to work on my thesis and this seems to be your most active time. You love to roll and punch and kick. I always make your dad come feel you and he will for a little bit. He says that he's most excited about meeting you but I admit I will miss having you to myself.

Lots of people have felt you kick. Grammy, Grandma, Aunt Cathy, Nana and even Grandpa have taken a turn. Grandpa is the most surprising to me. He didn't feel SG at all!

You received one Christmas present this year - Grandma gave you a duck towel and washcloth set. It's gender neutral since we don't know your gender. Daddy guesses boy. Mommy NEVER knows because I keep having dreams both ways!

I'm still craving ice. I'm also craving dessert. Growing you is good for my self-control. I pray that God gives me the strength to grow you in the best and healthiest way. You are a blessing. I love you.